Wednesday, 1 December 2010

Athletics writing

"1,2,3 GO!" I said to myself. I threw the discus as far as I could, BUT instead of throwing it out to get a 3 I threw it straight at Mrs Marychurch. It was like a flying saucer, heading straight for her foot. She jumped like she was on a trampoline and she flicked her legs up behind as it soared straight underneath her legs.
"Whew" I slowly mumbled to my self as my heart was pounding. Time to shake it off as we walked over to the high jump. I knew I was going to get a 3 I had been praceing for this but then all of the changed I ran up to the bar knock I tried it again knock this is my last chance to show them what I am made of I run as fast as I can I flick one of my legs over and the the other one I made it Ihad cleared the bar"wwwhhhhhhhhooooo" I shouted I did it again and again until they marked it down on the sheet the Lucy Bleackley had got a 3. By the time it was all over the sun was blazzzzzing hot. And that was my last athletics here at Riverdale.


  1. nice work I liked how you used describing words but next time don't use them straight after another but apart from that great.

  2. I liked you start 123 go it realy put you in there but to write in level 3 you need to pragegraph

  3. well done Luce
    what you did well- you added humor and great describing words.
    what you could do better next time- write in paragraphs.

  4. cool story hopefuly next time you wont hit mrs Merrecherc

  5. Great Luce!
    You explained how you felt when you got a three on High Jump! Next time you could maybe do some paragraphing? or maybe you could do a spelling check